Tuesday 19 January 2016

Immortalized in history

Immortality! Oh how wrong were we to think immortality meant never dying! Whether good or bad, a person can remain immortal in one's life depending on the roles they played in our lives when alive

We all stood transfixed on our respective spots, totally dumbfounded over the news Mom just hit us with. Whilst we still ruminate over the news, staring at each other in utter shock and disbelief, Mom calmly punched keys on her phone, her facial expression neither sad nor happy...just blank, her freshly dyed raven black hair falling slowly all over her face as she faced down staring at her phone while putting  calls through to some relatives of our late Dad to get more information about burial arrangements and the family's decision in light of the incident. Once she was through, Mom looked up, packed her hair into a careless bun at the back of her head then announced that the family has made it mandatory for members of the family who were in states around kogi state which are mainly abuja, kwara, ondo and edo states to gather for her burial which would be first thing in the morning the next day according to islamic rites and as a mark of respect, we were enjoined to be there,


 "But Mom, I have to go to work, I can't possibly attend the burial ceremony"

I cried out, Mom threw me a serious glance, handing me her phone for me to call my office and tell them I won't be making it to work for a few days,

"It's a family emergency son, you can't afford to miss it especially since you are close to the source of the emergency...am sorry son, you have to come with us, I will also call my boss and take an excuse for a few days"

She replied and with a  sigh of resignation, I reluctantly collected her phone to text Vivian my immediate boss about the emergency and to take  excuse for a few days, she replied minutes later saying it was cool. 

"So Mom, what happened to gran ma? Was she  sick?"

Karl asked, Hamz scoffed with derision,

 "So you call her gran ma?"

Mom sighed as Karl promptly responded,

 "Yes little brother, she might have been notorious for her vindictiveness  and domineering ways but you can't subtract from your life the fact that she's still your father's mother...your fucking grand mother",

Mom quickly cuts in, demanding she doesn't want to hear any swear words, sarcasms or use of F-words, Hamz nodded quickly, punching away on his phone keypad, his lips contoured irritably, she continued,

 "I agree with Karl, she might have made our lives a living hell, especially for me and the other wives married into the family but that's between us and her, you all owe her your respect and she is to you all, your grand mother...and as for what happened to her, she was said to have had a slight headache and demanded for water to drink saying she was thirsty, thereafter, she went to take a nap and by afternoon when she was tapped for her to wake up to have her lunch, she wasn't responding, later they found out she had long passed on, apparently, she died in her sleep. Now it's pretty late but we have to get prepared now and make the 2 hour plus journey to kogi state so pack only essentials guys, few clothes, toothbrush et al, we leave in 15 minutes, I will make some calls now and then we leave",

"I thought she was going to like have the ghosts of her late sons chase after her around and have her confess her sins before having a long and tortuous death"

Hamz said with a shrug,

"SHUT UP HAMZA"

Mom snapped,

"Leave judgement for God, I raised you better than that, I can never wish her ill despite all she did to me, so you had better say "astagfirullah" (God forgive me in arabic) seven times, you silly little snot, haba"

 Hamz grudgingly recited the word seven times, rubbing his palms at the seventh all over his face which got me smiling as he looked the picture of a stubborn little boy. As we all quickly moved towards our rooms to prepare, Karl asks who will drive, QT cuts in quickly seconding the question, going forward to remind us all that he couldn't do interstate driving at night, Mom sighed, scrolling through her contacts to find who she could call at such short notice to drive us to our hometown, it was some minutes to seven pm at this time. My brothers were all done in 5 minutes, I trailed a distant 5 minutes later and then Mom after me, we packed our bags together into the car booth and just as QT was stomping his feet in annoyance that we haven't gotten who will drive us down to our hometown and it was getting very late, a knock sounded on the gate and the gateman Garuba ran towards the gate to see who it was and in came a colleague of Mom at work who is also from our hometown, he walked briskly towards us, exchanging pleasantries with all of us, Mom apologised for dragging him in at such short notice to help us and he said it wasn't a problem,

 "I just have this big men for sons, they are such jelly fishes they can't do interstate driving at night"

She added jocularly , my brothers all rolled their eyes which got me smiling as we all entered the car, said our prayers for journey mercies and whilst driving out, Mom gave instructions to Garuba to keep the home safe till we get back, he nodded, waving us goodbye as we drove out, Hamz joked, asking if Garuba won't be so happy to have the entire house to himself and invite all his orange seller lovers for an unrestrained sexual parley, we all erupted with laughter but Mom wasn't laughing, she gave Hamz an icy stare and he quickly did the lips sealed sign. We all engaged in some banter and general conversations until we approached the outskirts of abuja when a sudden silence descended on everyone, it seemed like it just hit us why we were travelling at night...for the burial of a woman who reigned and brutally made our lives hell in one way or the other, Mom occasionally sighed then her phone starts ringing, it was her sister, she told her everything that happened and that we were on our way home, she wished us all journey mercies and hung up the phone, she sighed again then pulled out her large head scarf which she was sitting on from underneath her derriere and wrapped all over her head as though she was cold, perhaps Mom had prayed on many nights to see this day happened but from her sullen look in car, it seems she came to realise the matriarch would always be alive in her heart, her memories, her property, she would always run into things that would remind her of the matriarch, she sighed again as her thoughts seemed to float away towards her earliest memories of the matriarch, 

(FLASHBACK)- 1986 Was the year she first met with the Matriarch, a tall woman, stout in stature, her short woven aso oke firmly wrapped around her waist and her aso oke headgear mountaneously wrapped all over her head, she didn't like Mom from the very first moment she set eyes on her, she had wanted to set Dad up with a friend's daughter for an arranged marriage to boost hers and the girl's family's status in that society at the time but Dad bluntly refused, Mom took it all in stride and opened up to Dad her fears of his mother but he told her not to worry that he got her. Then came Mom's marriage, it  was a fairytale, a dream come true, her parents were proud, their daughter had married from an illustrious family but the Matriarch didn't hide the fact that she didn't like Mom even at the wedding, her thoughts drifted to when Dad died, how she was dragged by the hair, beaten and humiliated as being the cause of Dad's death, how the Matriarch made her life a living hell, it was such a torture and for her kids sake, Mom chose to let herself get used to it.

(REALITY)- Everywhere was stark dark, we barely met cars on the way except occasional fast moving buses speeding up to get into abuja before it's super late, our car's headlight sliced through the thick darkness, illuminating our way through, Mom was still deep in thoughts, Hamz turned to stare at her as his own thoughts too seem to drift into his memories of the Matriarch,

FLASHBACK- Hamz probably didn't know why his mother was wailing but it seemed to make him cry a lot, this was shortly after Dad's death, he grew up seeing the anger blended with palpable fear Mom had towards the woman who seemed to be part of the family but wasn't sure exactly her position, Hamz grew up to despise greatly his father's mother , he never liked her for a day which am sure gladdened Mom's heart only she never showed it, Karl on the other hand knew the Matriarch towards the end of her life, she was still as mean as always but slowed down by age, she welcomed Karl with open arms, partly due to being part white and looking more white than mixed, as far as she was concerned, Karl was a thing of pride, a "white" son coming all the way from america to look for his Dad's family and thinking Mom won't support the idea of him living with us, she openly accepted him out of spite towards Mom but Mom had already made peace with that part of her life. Though Karl could see some of her acts of wickedness, he finds it quite confusing thinking she could be capable of all the terrible things we've regaled him with that she had done to us in the past, all the same, he maintained a lengthy distance from her. QT is a man of few words, he clearly doesn't support what his paternal gran ma has done to us through the years but he rarely says anything against her.

REALITY- In the car, all was still silent, Mom cleared her throat and thanked her colleague again for driving us, he acknowledged her greeting, QT who was sitting beside the driver slot in a music disc in the car stereo and increasing the volume a bit, nicki minaj's song filtered out jazzing both myself and Hamz back to bubbly life as we moved our upper bodies to the rhythm, Mom eyeballed the both of us, saying if it is a quranic or islamic song, we would all quieten down and be pissed, rolling our eyes repeatedly,  Mom's colleague, QT and Karl erupted in fits of giggles but we couldn't care, we kept gyrating. Hours later and we arrived at our Dad's family's country home, the huge gate flung open and the gateman quickly hurried towards the side of our car to ascertain our identity, flashing a bright torch through the car window to see our faces and seeing it was us, his face went sad, he stepped back quickly, mumbled some inaudible prayer and bowing to welcome us, hurriedly went to open the gate fully for us, we drove in and met sparse number of people sprinkled in various places around the vast compound, some sobbing, some sighing, others just chatting, sitting idly, the moment we stepped out of the car then some old women on sighting us stood up and bursted out wailing, Karl was shocked, it was as though they were positioned to wail the moment they sight any member of the family arrive because just about the same time, another car drove in carrying some of our cousins and their mom, the old women started running towards us, some threw themselves on the floor rolling and crying,

Mom quickly whispered to  us to recite some prayers for protection, we do that whenever we come here as she believes the people are potent with voodoo and doesn't want us attacked in the guise of condoling with us, we quickly did and Mom turning to face the women who were close to us now, quickly contorted  her face in grief, I almost laughed when I saw that, she hugged the women, taking care not to inhale their stale smell as the rest of the women flocked around us, everyone wanting to hug us, especially Karl who was almost going red with irritation. We exchanged pleasantries with our cousins from edo state who started on their journey earlier than us as our mothers shared knowing glances of excitement that their common arch enemy is dead but trying their best not to laugh.

The women kept wailing thus calling the attention of our paternal aunties and relatives inside who came out to see who had arrived, we were all casually welcomed, as our relatives all put on gloomy faces, Hamz turned to me asking why they should be wearing gloomy faces,

 "Afterall, she was way old and past 70" ,

 I just shook my head and smiled. We went in and after settling down, Mom and her sister-in-law started regaling others of the nice memories they had of her, shedding crocodile tears in sympathy but Dad's sisters weren't having non of it, they snickered and clapped their hands, they sprang up at once saying they knew Mom and her sister-in-law and the rest coming were happy to know their mother had died and should quit shedding fake tears which they knew were tears of happiness and joy, a burst of laugh escaped Mom's lips as she quickly gathered herself together in embarrassment, making an irritated face to make it seem as though the escaped laughter was that of irritation from scoffing, gosh, I know my Mom so much. Elderly women who were present calmed both parties, saying that wasn't the time to get  their rivalry claws out and be sullen as the moment required.

We were asked if we would eat as lots of women who were members of the many associations and clubs the Matriarch was part of before she died brought all sorts of food for the family but we politely declined, we packed our bags and went to our room upstairs as we no longer need to be shown the way from the many family reunions we've attended.

Early morning the next day, the Matriarch's daughters went to give the corpse a final bath and had her grey, coarse hair braided in two plaits, all the male grand and great grand children who had the mind were allowed to be present while this was done but I and Hamz stood at a respectable distance while Karl and QT were in front, white clothes were brought in which she was tightly wrapped in as wailing started in earnest again and in the compound outside, drumming and dancing could be heard as praise singers encouraged all to be merry as the Matriarch had died a distinguished woman, a woman of substance, a muslim, an alhaja, I muffled a laugh at that. More whites clothes were brought including the white shawl she wrapped herself around in  when she visited the holy land of mecca on pilgrimage  way back then, this is done to give corpses a welcoming grace into heaven as it is believed.

 Some men had gone to dig her grave, a narrow rectangular hole with levels carved to place planks upon which would be used to cover the corpse. Back home, the Matriarch's body was lifted and brought out to be prayed upon before being buried, we all trooped out as the chief imam of the area well dressed in his regalia led the prayers for the repose of the late Matriarch after which he asked for witnesses to confirm she prays 5 times everyday and people cheered in admission that she does, she was uplifted and carried towards the burial ground, women cried and screamed, men shook heads and bit their fingers, the women from the Matriarch's many clubs and association dressed in different shades of the same pattern of ankara with the Matriarch's image on it sang and danced a victory tune on her behalf, it was as though a queen was being taken to be buried, despite all our animosity towards her, our hearts melted, goose bumps covered our entire skin, our body quivered as the pallbearers shouted the name of God and then gently lowered her body into her grave, making sure she was tilted so her head faces the east, the direction muslim faces during prayer, then sticks and planks and a mat was used to cover her before sand was poured all over the hole and filled up.

 I couldn't believe it when tears trickled down my face and the wailing intensified from the crowd, Mom soon started crying, it was so emotional, I sniffed repeatedly, looking around at other family members to see how they were doing and saw some wives married into the family looking stone cold bare faced, I almost smiled seeing they've been hurt so bad by this woman and couldn't give a hoot if she died, I turned back towards where the remains of the woman who had terrorized us for so long, just before we turned to go back home and as if Mom was reading my mind, we both knew the Matriarch wasn't really dead, as in our hearts, she will remain immortal in our respective histories, we both whispered,

 "GOODBYE MATRIARCH"

 KEEP UP

18 comments:

  1. Wow, this is some really rich post, so sad, i really pitied the matriarch at the end, wish you gave more details on the atrocities committed by her but maybe you were trying not to give too much details and you and hamz always crack me up, lolz
    -Wendy,Jamaica

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  2. This posts makes me wonder if truly the evil that men do live after them or you can buy your way out if you are wealthy, the matriarch was buried in a blaze of glory yet she's notorious for her evil ways or was she just evil with her family? this post is everything maj
    -Gabby Toledo, texas usa

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  3. The burial rites was quite vivid, wow, had no idea that's how muslims bury their people, and please maj, do help spank hamz for me, his joke on the gateman got me in stitches lolz,may the sould of the matrirach rip
    -Justin Banks, USA

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  4. Your mother tho, lmao, this piece is as funny as it's moving, let me read all over again
    -Lawrence, abuja

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  5. goodbye to the matriarch, she did reigned, nice post, quite funny, very richly told, but my question is, how could you tell what your mom was thinking or to fill blank space, you filled in your thoughts into theirs (including your siblings), i give this piece 8 over 10, the title, dope as always
    -VAUGHAN PH

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  6. you guys rock and mom asking you all to say a quick prayer against demons got me laughing, you getting alot better maj
    -Fatima, zaria

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  7. now that is some piece, wow maj, loolz, i love you man, would your brothers read this?
    -Williams, britain

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  8. ssorry maj but your grams is one slaying bitch, she got away with a tortuous death, literally slept her way through, got buried in a blaze of glory and went to her grave feeling like a diva,lolz
    -Modupe, lagos

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  9. burials are sad and makes us emotional, even if it's our arch enemy being buried but saying some relatives were bare faced and cold got me laughing, this post is everything
    -IDOWU OMOBOLA,LAGOS

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  10. maj, am loving you already, regards to your mom

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  11. calling your mom's butt derriere? lolz maj, you badass and yes i love this piece, feels rich and vivid
    -Omotola, ilorin

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  12. yur narrating technique is quite superb maj

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  13. you should real life photos maj, sneak peak photos, cmon
    -Yetunde, lagos

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  14. This is a nice post but how did you get into the thoughts of your family?
    -Zubaida, tehran

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  15. cool but the flash back seems more like you just narrating a story in a story, the vividness of a 1st person narrative wasn't felt, so sorry about the grams tho
    -Sylvia, australia

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  16. awww, the ending got me, she will truly remain immortal

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  17. *CLAPS* NICE READ MAJ
    REUBEN, ABUJA

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  18. finally, the matriarch dies!
    -Jamal, usa

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