Hell hath no roar like an adam scorned 1

Family is overrated you would agree with me right? That picture perfect happiness,laughter,love,comfort and affection that supposedly characterizes a family is just blown out of all proportion...come down to earth and you will realise that there's a lot of drama inherent in family,it is just the way it is.

It was a chilly harmattan morning,my "little uncle" Kareem who is my mom's half-brother and just a year or two older than me who was staying with us for the time being had woken up early that morning and stealthily packed his stuffs,ready to leave for our hometown,he had met with Mom and gran ma (hereafter gran ma refers to mom's mom while Matriarch refers to dad's mom) and told them privately he was leaving but didn't tell aunt nina and aunt hubaida who were also staying with us for a while,this was serious because it was aunt nina who had invited Kareem to come from our hometown to be his "houseboy" so to speak,helping her with her laundry and other sundry chores as she was usually sick which to me was because she was quite OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) about everything,she's such a cleany-bug about everything and to me,when you're antiseptic about everything,you fall sick often. Kareem packed his stuffs,bid me farewell,since he's more a friend
than an uncle and sneaked out and left for our hometown with not more than a thousand naira on him,he was that desperate to leave just because of these aunties of mine from hell!


Aunt nina was visibly upset when she woke up and found out Kareem was gone,he was like her righthand  man and discovering he had sneaked off and escaped home without telling her made her upset and embarrassed,she was irritable throughout and that was when the drama started, it was the day the lord had made because it was the day I finally had the guts to deal with my aunty and send a message of fear into them and deliver myself and my brothers from their controlling manners. It wasn't as if we couldn't have done this long ago but as customs demand and out of respect to Mom,even though her sisters disrespect and hurl insults at her at will,even in the presence of their kids,we chose to always respect them but as humans,our patience has its limits.

She had started her war of words with QT over the use of toilet,QT really fought back his emotions,restraining himself from slapping her,he just walked off into his room and slammed the door,she walked out,cursing aloud and teary,I didn't know it was going to be my turn,she went out to the tap outside and turned on me accusing me of allowing strangers stray into our compound to ease themselves,I mean,is this woman mad? I really lost it at that moment and told her she was being irrational and then it happened!

Aunty nina shouted at me,telling me how rude and an idiot I was because I talked back at her explaining how wrong she was and also that I lied about me not seeing Kareem leave the house,she said we were friends and I must have known,I just smiled and she started insulting me,I tried to remain calm and restrain myself from saying anything by singing aloud,fetching water into large drums as there was scarcity of water,the dry season was beginning to creep in,so I was fetching enough water to last the day,she took my action of singing as an affront and shouted at me again as I felt all of my pent up anger towards her well up inside of me to almost regurgitation,I couldn't take it anymore and screamed at her to shut her mouth,immediately she slapped me,I was livid with rage,I felt a wave of boldness overtake me,at that moment,I was as tenacious as hell,though my head kept saying, "don't do it",I couldn't control my body,I raised my hand and gave her a dirty
slap and with that initial slap,my fear and respect for her disappeared,then I landed her another and yet another,continuously,her wrapper fell,she was dazed,she obviously was as shocked as much as I was as the stings of my bitch-slap sinked into her cheeks,Gran ma was around and my other aunty,hubaida and her children who all rushed out and held me,QT also rushed out and he kept shouting me down and telling me not to utter a word,Gran ma wailed,telling me not to beat her daughter,the first child of aunt hubaida,Ria jumped at me,trying to beat me and defend her aunty,lol,I gave her an almost deadly jab to the neck which sent her doubling over in agony,my eyes were looking deadly,neighbors were watching with horror from their balconies,seeing a Maj they never thought was possible  and shouting for me to stop,aunt nina picked up a plank,advancing towards me to hit me and the plank toppled over a bucket of water,making the well designed interlocked grounds
slippery,seeing her action,I was charged and advanced towards her,ready to intercept the plank and beat her till she starts gasping for breath,everyone,including neighbors who didn't move an inch from their balconies screamed thunder,probably too transfixed at seeing  a soft-spoken,quiet,gentle,prim and proper Maj gone gangster,how the hell did we get here?

 Taking you down history  lane abit, you all know Mom has 3 siblings,all girls and of all these,Mom is the one whom you  would say has a level of success that  is greater than the rest of her siblings,not because she is luckier,although luck is part of it,but more of hardwork,prayer and good old common sense and as girls,when one of your sisters is way ahead,it begets jealousy in the minds of others,so I hope you can deduce the history...Mom had tried to be the patient one and tolerated their shits,I can't even begin to state the cruelty and emotional torture they have put us through over the years growing up and Mom NEVER defended us against them,even though aunt hubaida would growl at anyone,including Mom if she scolds her kids,I had thought at the time that she was mean and loved her sisters over her own children but not until I became an adult did I realise the moral behind her "indifference" which is to make us emotionally strong and not depend on
mummy having our backs and defending us always because we won't always be together,what happens when we are away from her or have a job and people zing us? We start thinking, "only if mummy was here", we are men and she was forging us to be independent men not tied to her apron strings and develop a titanium skin and am grateful.

Immediately! Neighbors in their compounds,ever the bad belles called Mom who was at the office and reported to her what was going on,by this time,a cousin of Mom who was around for a visit had forcibly pulled me aside and told me to get dressed and follow her to her house to calm down,Mom called me and calmly asked what was going on at home and I explained,she said ok and hung up.

I spent the whole day at Mom's cousin's house watching documentaries about the development of dubai into a mega city it is today and it calmed me down,sipping chilled water,by evening,Mom had arrived from work and heard all that happened,my brothers,especially QT and Hamz were all in support of me,as we've all suffered in the hands of these aunties,Karl simply looked on,pulling Hamz away from doing something drastic as he doesn't have as much patience as I do and since he does all I command him to and am not around,Karl had to hold him,Mom calmly listened to all parties and apologised to aunt nina and demanded my brothers do same but it was obvious she didn't feel sorry I hit her,she knew she deserved it.

 I was called and told to come back home and apologise to aunt nina and I grudgingly did,it pained me that I had to apologise but it felt good that I had hit her

Hell truly has no roar like an adam scorned and I would tell you why,I hit my aunty and honestly I loved every bit of it,atleast during the act because later I had to apologise and it was because I was pushed to the wall so much my back bruised and I had to rebel and when an adam rebels?....hell has no roar like it.

 Am never one to hit women,not the least my mom's younger sister,so for me to raise my hand to hit her and enjoyed the act,oh good God,I was pissed and fed up beyond measure. Growing up,Mom usually took us to their home in another state for the holidays and it is usually one of the worst times of our lives,in truth,their were some amazing memories but there were more bitter memories than good ones,our aunties nina,aunty hubaida and aunty tia were such a pain in the butt,they found fault in all we do,but if I were to pick an aunty who I would say was better and showed more care,it was aunty tia,now let me state their profiles

AUNTY TIA- Now late (may her soul rest in perfect bliss with the lord and for this reason,I can only state her good deeds and she was my best aunty anyway) She was tomboy-ish,very pretty and when we were younger,she had a temparament of a military man,she got me my first bicycle ever and was sweet to me,she was my diva aunty,she made me love reading magazines,she loves glossy mags and she would say how I am so prim and proper and how refined my english was even at a young age and took me along on her dates,it was always a nice time,that would be it on aunty tia before I start crying,lol,now "dem dem aunties"

 AUNTY HUBAIDA- Honestly,I can't seem to find the proper word to describe this woman,she's a full fledge hypocrite, very ungrateful and her only talent is churning out kids,she is such a weak woman and believes her older siblings should do all the work and cater to her,aunt hubaida actually did,probably because she had no kids of her own but Mom has financial commitments,she has kids and she has herself to develop through education,Mom was a widow who had no one to depend upon but God and herself to survive in this brutal world,but not aunt hubaida,for some warped reasons best known to her,she believes it's my mom's right to take care of her,she suffered a long and bitter marriage which led to a nasty divorce and left with 5 kids,I mean,how does a woman feel trapped in a marriage and yet keep enjoying sex with the man who abuses her and even gives birth to his kids,oh lord,Mom is really an intelligent woman,a lot of stories are embedded in every event
I've stated and gradually I would relay them,so that is who aunt hubaida is,mother of 5,divorced,cranky,unemployed,very ungrateful,believes she's always right and loves everyone catering to herself and her kids,all recipes for a highly twisted woman.

AUNT NINA- She's a very sick woman,I mean literally always sick,she's quite OCD about everything,before she uses a toilet,even if it's just to urinate,whether the place is clean or not and which is always clean anyway,she would re-scrub the entire place,spray the whole place with air freshner,the same applies to her using her phone,she has a sanitizer she uses to wipe clean the phone,don't even get me started on her finicky cleaning procedure she indulges in cleaning her fruits,cups,etc,yes,she's quite antiseptic about everything like that and she is averse to women using hair relaxers because it causes cancer in the long run,her spinach and other veggies in soups has to be large and spread out because  when chopped too tiny,the vitamins are lost and despite her cleany-buggy lifestyle,she is the most sick,don't get me wrong,am a neat person,very neat but not living my life as though am preparing for a surgery. Aunt nina also believes she knows it
all,trust me it would drive you insane,she loves to be in control,she is the last child of her parents but wants to control her older siblings and she hates Mom,it is just too obvious,unfortunately God has a sense of humour,when someone caters to you,helps you,prays for you and rather than be grateful,you cause drama and make tyheir life difficult,he (God) would continue to make you depend on that person,you will hate them but you can't do without them,that is nana's case and since she hates Mom,you can only imagine the kind of hatred she would have for her offsprings and oh,she made us go through hell...well,until I slapped the bejesus out of her

 The next day,my friend Tchubs came around and we were discussing about the events of the previous day and he laughed,heaved a deep sigh and opened up about his own drama

he told me "you think you have the weight of the world on your shoulders until you hear what other people go through, do you know...?"

KEEP UP